If setting clear goals is so crucial for us to achieve a successful and fulfilling future, then why do so many people fail to do it? Why are so many people allowing the river of life to pull them in all directions?

1) Limiting Beliefs

The first thing that holds most people back from setting goals are their limiting beliefs. Many people only dream about what they would love to have. When it comes to committing to a specific target and plan, they don't even bother. Something inside them says 'there is no way'. Either it's too difficult or they simply don't have what it takes.

You now know that these are nothing but limiting beliefs. Unless we break past these generalizations about ourselves, we will never dare to design goals that drive us to the next level.

2) They Don't Know What They Want

'But... I don't know what I want!' This is probably one of the most common responses I get from people. I bet if I gave these people a magic lamp and told them that they would be granted anything they wish for, they will start making up a whole list of things real quick!

It is not that people don't know what they want. What has truly happened is that most people have stopped daring to dream. I believe that as kids, all of us had fantasies and dreams of what we wanted to have and be when we grow up. However, as we went through life, we meet with so many failures and disappointments that our rational, critical mind has forbidden us to continue day dreaming anymore.

Whenever we get excited about something, our internal voice will rush in to tell us, 'it can't be done' 'you cannot do that' ' that's impossible.' 'grow up, get real'. (It could even be an echo of our parents' voice, if we had stern, no-nonsense parents). As a result, this would block our creative juices and deflate our passion - the very elements we need to create and design the life we truly want.

We need to learn how to unlock our imagination and set our creative minds FREE....free of fear and inhibitions so we can dream clearly and with growing excitement of what we truly want out of life.

3) Fear of Failure

This fear of failure, of rejection and embarrassment is what probably paralyses most people from even starting out. I had a participant in one of my seminars who never dared set goals because of her intense fear of failing if she did not achieve what she had set her heart and mind to.

In her mind, she reckoned that if she did not set expectations, then she could not fail!

My mum did something similar when she was sitting for her final O level examinations over 40 years ago. She was sure she would fail maths (which she hated), and so she decided she would rather not take the exam than have a fail mark!

Sound crazy, but many people do the same thing. They believe that it is better not to have expectations so they cannot let themselves down.

Does this mean that people who keep setting goals do not fear failure? I don't believe so. I think everyone hates and fears the feeling of failure, including myself.

What then gives them the courage to set high goals and go for it? It is how we define failure to ourselves. The only one who can tell us that we failed and make us feel bad is... ourselves.

Yet, this is how we often shoot ourselves in the foot. The moment we do not achieve what we want, even on our first attempt, we tell ourselves we have failed, and feel really bad.

This pain is what prevents us - and this goes for the majority of people - from daring to try for high stakes, to taking risks.

4) Addiction to the Soft Life

Most people are risk averse because they are addicted to a way of life: a soft life, a cushy life with habits and material comforts they are loathed to change or risk losing. Unless that comfy life-style is imminently under threat, they won't do anything that calls for iron will and discipline.

Setting goals and really going for our goals often means changing habits, sacrificing time spent hanging out with friends. This is why people make half-hearted attempts. As soon as their new path impinges on their old habits, they withdraw...it's too hard.

A friend who teaches a Detox & Energise self-help program says most people don't stick to it because even if they believe in its long-term health benefits, they are not willing to work at it....and it is life-long work. They'd rather pop a pill (a drug) and dam the long-term consequences.

There are no short-cuts to success in any area - business/career, health or personal relationships. So, be prepared to make what appears to be 'sacrifices' and, if you do, the rewards are there.

Adam Khoo is an entrepreneur, a best-selling author and a peak performance trainer. A self-made millionaire by the age of 26, he owns and runs several businesses in education, training, event management and advertising, all with a combined annual turnover of $20 million. His best-selling "Patterns of Excellence" is a complete step-by-step system that will literally program you for success in life.

• 1 Comments

  

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Dear All,

I wish to congratulate Adam Khoo on his successful life style and authoring the Book "Patterns of Excellence."

Success in life involves diverse encounters, But the key to success is positive thinking.

It also takes to account the associates who tear down our performances only to demoralize, black mail and throw out of the window whatever available achievement.

This brings about another question.

Why does the two words exist? Success and failure!

A word of encouragement and appreciation is crucial in ones performance.

Thanks to the Patterns of Excellence.

Grace.

 Posted by: Grace Mulei at February 9, 2009 5:20 PM

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